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Sunday CD Vol.103

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How To Maintain a Good Relationship When Your Partner Is Unemployed

When one person is suddenly home all day, the rules and routines sometimes have to be renegotiated.

You Will Need

• Understanding
• A heart-to-heart
• Respect
• Optimism

Step 1: Cut them some slack

If your spouse is trying to find another job, don’t expect them to start doing all the housework. Looking for a job, especially in a bad economy, can be a full-time job in itself.

Step 2: But don't be a sap, either

But don’t cut them too much slack, either. If it becomes obvious your loved one is neither looking for a job nor pitching in with the kids or housework, it’s time for a serious discussion.

Step 3: Discuss expectations

Discuss one another’s expectations, preferably before tempers flare. Come to a mutually acceptable agreement on what housework or child care, if any, the out-of-work partner will assume until they find another job.

Step 4: Treat your partner like an adult

Don’t subject them to a daily grilling on what they’re doing to find work, or what they did all day while you were out. They are no doubt already feeling inadequate.

Step 5: Be on the lookout

Be on the lookout for signs of depression, like sleeping too much or not being able to sleep, or over- or undereating. If your partner turns to alcohol, drugs, porn, gambling, or other destructive behaviors, insist they get counseling.

Men are particularly susceptible to depression after a job loss because much of their self-esteem is tied to their work.

Step 6: Keep up their spirits

Keep assuring them that you have complete faith in their ability to find another job. Most importantly, stay positive yourself.

The American Time-Use Survey shows men tend to do less housework after they lose their job.

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How To Stay Friends With an Ex

You’ve heard it before: “Can we still be friends?” But this time, you actually mean it. Here’s how to make it work.

You Will Need

• Time apart
• Sensitivity
• A willing ex

Step 1: Give it time

Give it time. Right after the breakup, agree not to see each other for a while. No matter how amicable your split was, breakups are always painful. Allow time for wounds to heal before approaching the subject of friendship.

Step 2: Make a clean break

Resist the temptation to call them every time you’re having a bad day or see something that reminds you of them. To make a clean break, you need to learn to live without them. Otherwise, neither of you will truly be able to move on, or transition into a real friendship.

Do not have sex with your ex; it violates boundaries and can ruin your chances of ever becoming friends.

Step 3: Examine your motives

Ask yourself why you want to stay friends. Do you feel guilty for dumping them? Are you lonely? Do you secretly want to get back together? If so, you’re not ready. Make sure you’re in it for the right reasons before initiating contact.

Starting a new romance with someone else before you try to strike up a friendship with your ex can help boost your confidence and avoid the temptation of getting back together.

Step 4: Make contact

Start by sending a friendly email. Suss out your ex’s willingness by casually suggesting coffee or lunch. Meet in a public place during daylight hours – there’s less of a chance for drama.

Step 5: Know your boundaries

Keep the topics of discussion to safe, neutral topics. Forbidden topics include: what went wrong with your relationship, any new romantic involvement of yours or theirs, and their personal life.

Step 6: Stick with it

Be patient. There’s a reason things didn’t work out between the two of you; being friends instead of lovers doesn’t necessarily make those issues disappear. But there’s also a reason you’re drawn to each other, and if you both stick with it, you can form a lasting friendship.

One study found that men take breakup much harder than women do.

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How To Know When It's Time To Break Up

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but you’ve got to make up your mind about splitting up in the first place. These soul-searching tips will help.

You Will Need

• An evaluation of your relationship
• A self-assessment
• Honesty

Step 1: Leave an abuser

If you are being physically abused, break it off immediately: It is definitely time to get out.

Step 2: Don't tolerate emotional abuse, either

Don’t tolerate emotional abuse, either. If your partner spends much of their time belittling you, it is not a healthy relationship.

Step 3: Evaluate your spats

If you’ve been fighting lately, think about the substance of your spats. Are they about inconsequential things? Or do you have insurmountable differences in important areas like money, sex, or parenting?

Be realistic: No relationship can stay in the honeymoon phase forever.

Step 4: Ask yourself if you're still in "like"

Forget about being madly in love, which is a stage of romantic love that’s difficult to sustain. Figure out if you still like your partner.

Step 5: Analyze why you're staying

Think about why you’ve stayed in the relationship this far. Is there real love there, or are you afraid to be alone? Are financial reasons keeping you from moving on? Are you dreading hurting this person’s feelings? None of these are good reasons to stay in a bad relationship.

Step 6: Be honest

Ready to pack your bags? Answer one more question: Is it your relationship that’s making you restless, or is it something else? Changing partners won’t make you happy if the person you are really displeased with is yourself.

Just two percent of people surveyed admitted to breaking up with someone via text message

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How to learn English

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How To Select a Gift For a Teacher

Whether it is your school, karate, or dance teacher, show gratitude for their hard work with a personal gift.

You Will Need

• Gift ideas
• Communication

Step 1: Find out the school's policy

Check with the school to find out if they have a policy with regard to gifts. Some schools frown on the practice.

Step 2: Talk with your child

Learn the teacher’s interests to get ideas about what the teacher would like.

A gift that relates directly to the teacher’s vocation is always a safe bet.

Step 3: Go shopping

Go shopping with your child and let them select a gift if you choose to buy one.

Step 4: Avoid handmade gifts

Avoid making gifts. Most teachers have accumulated so many handmade gifts that they can’t display them all.

Step 5: Organize collection

Organize a collection among parents of other students to purchase one big gift if people are interested.

Step 6: Consider a gift card

Consider giving the teacher a gift card so that they can get themselves something they can use.

In 2009, approximately 4.2 million public school students enrolled in the 9th grade in the United St

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How To Cycle a Fish Tank

Ensure a healthy, balanced environment in your aquarium by following this simple process.

You Will Need

• A fish tank
• A filter
• Hardy fish
• Water samples

Step 1: Set up fish tank

Set up your fish tank and filter system, then fill it with water.

Avoid using water with chlorine.

Step 2: Stock with hardy fish

Stock your tank with hardy fish, such as mollies, tiger barbs, white clouds, or guppies.

Hold off on goldfish; they are more vulnerable to disease.

Step 3: Limit the number

Put in just a few fish. Three 1-inch fish are sufficient if your tank is between 10 and 20 gallons.

Adding too many fish will result in excess waste and stress the fish.

Step 4: Change the water

Change 10 to 15 percent of the water every few days.

Step 5: Test a water sample

Test a sample of the water after a week. It should test high in ammonia with a trace of nitrate at this time.

Ask the pet shop where you bought the fish if they’ll test it. Many stores will do this for free or charge a small fee.

Step 6: Continue the process

Continue moderate water changes every two weeks. Cycling a tank takes up to eight weeks. Your goal is to establish a healthy colony of bacteria that live in the filter, removing ammonia and other toxins from the water.

Step 7: Add more fish gradually

Add more fish gradually, and enjoy watching them thrive as a result of your diligence.

The animals in the “Oceanarium” at Chicago’s Shedd Aquarium consume over 650 pounds of seafood each day.

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How To Care For an Elderly Cat

Life expectancy has increased dramatically for cats. They routinely live into their late teens, and as a result, might need a little more help than when they were younger.

You Will Need

• A beloved elderly cat
• Pet stairs or materials to make a ramp
• A cat brush or comb
• A veterinarian
• Fresh water
• An extra dose of TLC

Step 1: Build ramps or stairs

Older cats are less active and have trouble reaching things, so build ramps or buy pet stairs to help Kitty onto his favorite chair or windowsill.

Step 2: Schedule checkups

Schedule veterinary checkups every 6 months.

Ask your vet whether you should change your aging kitty’s diet. For instance, some older cats do better on a diet of canned food.

Step 3: Keep cat away from drafts

Make sure eating, sleeping, and litter areas are in cozy spots throughout the home, far from any drafts. Older cats feel the cold more easily than youngsters.

Step 4: Groom cat

Self-grooming habits may take a hit as your kitty’s joints become stiff. Remove loose hair and stimulate circulation by brushing or combing your cat once a week.

Approach a cat with hearing problems from the front to avoid startling him.

Step 5: Keep fresh water within reach

Kidney function often declines in an older cat. Keep fresh water within easy reach.

If your cat seems to drink and urinate much more than usual, schedule a vet appointment. Kidney medication can be very helpful.

Step 6: Keep cats indoors

Be extra vigilant about keeping older cats indoors—the sad truth is that some older cats go out and don’t come back.

Step 7: Give him attention

Though your cat may not be as frisky or playful as he once was, he needs your love just as much as ever. Take time to give him extra attention—and lift him onto your lap for a cuddle if he can’t jump as well these days.

Cats were considered sacred in ancient Egypt, and many pet cats were mummified—sometimes with a handful of embalmed mice by their sides.

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How To Clean Your Cat's Teeth

If your feline friend has breath that could kill a woolly mammo

th, this guide will help clean your little saber tooth’s fangs without much fuss.

You Will Need

• Tuna water
• Chicken broth
• Gauze
• Cat toothbrush
• Enzymatic toothpaste

Step 1: Practice without brushing

Practice by dipping your finger in tuna water or chicken broth and touching your cat’s teeth to condition them to enjoy the experience.

Avoid using leashes or collars to restrain your cat and keep each session to around 30 seconds.

Step 2: Use gauze

Wrap your finger in gauze and continue with the tuna water or chicken broth method.

Step 3: Introduce toothbrush and toothpaste

Introduce your cat to the toothbrush and toothpaste by having them lick the paste from the brush.

Use an enzymatic toothpaste and only apply a tiny drop to the brush; never use toothpaste that contains fluoride.

Step 4: Start with canine teeth

Start with either the upper or lower canine teeth and use a gentle up and down motion to remove food particles.

Step 5: Give rewards

Stroke your cat’s muzzle or back as you brush and reward them with a treat after each session.

Step 6: Increase range

Increase the range of brushing with each session until you can do all the teeth top and bottom. Eventually, your cat will look forward to the cleaning and you’ll enjoy the fresh smell!

The Saber Tooth Tiger had front fangs that measured up to 7 inches long, but luckily the species went extinct over 10,000 years ago.

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